The subject of sex work is highly taboo; with people wither being accepting of it or strongly against it. However, at the end of the day, sex workers are providing a service to their customers; therefore they should be respected in the same light as other workers, despite the nature of the industry.
If you are thinking about meeting a sex worker for their services, here is a simple guideline of how your etiquette towards them should be. This guideline ensures that both you and the sex worker will feel comfortable and safe.
Be careful with the language you use
The back and forth debate surround the rights of sex workers has certainly been at the forefront of the media over the last number of years. Those opposed to the legality of sex work in the U.K may use derogatory terms such as “prostitute” or “whore” which is totally unacceptable. If you wish to arrange an appointment with a sex worker but still insist on using rude words to address them or the nature of their work, perhaps this says more about your character than theirs. “Language that reflects the humanity of the person, or people being described is a process that requires continual revision. One of the biggest issues facing sex workers today, and indeed throughout history, is social stigma. Although political correctness frequently comes in for mocking, we cannot and will not achieve social equality for anyone if the language we use to describe marginalised groups actually reinforces the stigma they face.”
Booking an appointment
Many customers can be highly rude and demanding when trying to arrange a session with sex workers as they do not treat sex work as a real business, but would you call a restaurant and demand them to give you a table when it is fully booked? When booking an appointment, whether it is via email, SMS or phone call, it is important to speak politely and treat it just as you are booking a restaurant reservation or hair appointment.
How you can be an ally to sex workers
Being an ally isn’t simply about adopting the title and say you respect sex workers, it is the continuous support and action towards this community. This starts from respecting their choice to be a sex worker, and avoiding trying to “rescue” them. An ally should educate those who speak badly or use derogatory terms towards sex workers and help to break down the stigma attached to the industry. If you want to take even further action to help the health and safety of sex workers, petition your local MP or elected officials to work towards providing sex workers with better and safer working conditions.
No means no
A sex worker has the right to refuse their services to you, for instance if you are too drunk, too young or if you are being rude to them. Like any other business or service, they are not obliged to take you on as a customer if they do not wish to do so therefore if you have been refused, please take this as a straight and finalised answer. If you are too intoxicated and pose a threat to any of the staff or other customers, then you should expect to me removed from the premises. Also, it is essential that protection is worn, which is always provided by the sex worker, therefore you should not ask if any of the services should be performed without.
To ensure that your appointment is a pleasurable and comfortable experience for both you and the sex worker, it is essential that you meet personal hygiene standards. Please shower before your session, as well as making sure your dental hygiene is okay and that you use deodorant. Most massage parlours have showering facilities for you to use after your massage, however you may be asked to use them before as well.
Once you know the etiquette towards a sex worker, you can try booking a happy ending massage in the Soho area if you are nearby, or anywhere in Oriental Massage’s other massage shop locations. Do not hesitate to try outcall as well!